Thursday, February 07, 2008

The Captain

Saying for the day:Everytime a child says 'I don't believe in elves,' there's a a little elf somewhere that falls down laughing.

Are you ready for another fairy tale or as usual to be more exact an elf tale.
Ready or not here it comes:
Once upon a time not long long ago but sorta long ago there lived in a far away place called Cornwall which is part of a country called England (even though all the Cornish to this very day aren’t sure they should be), a young boy named Edward. His father was a Cornish tin miner at the time when one by one the Cornish tin mines were closing, forever. The family lived from day to day never being sure that there would be a job for the father tomorrow.
One day Edward’s father said “I have saved up enough money to book us passage to America where the streets are lined with gold and everyone is rich.” So they packed up what few belongings they had and set sail on the great ship Lusitania.
Edward loved the ship. He noticed that the Captain had his own dining room and that special people like the very rich or the very famous were invited to eat with him and they considered it an honor. Right there and then he decided that he was not going to be miner but a ship Captain. Of course he never got invited to the Captain’s dining room because he was in steerage and didn’t count for anything.
When they reached Ellis Island the man that was interviewing them had trouble with Edward’s father’s name which was Tylecote, Fredrick M Tylecote. First off he couldn’t read the father’s writing ( Cornish tin miners are not known for their penmanship) and the Cornish brogue just threw him. So he said” look from now on your Fredrick Smith” and that’s what he put on all the paperwork. Thus Edward John Tylecorte became Edward John Smith.
The family then traveled to an odd town called Ishpeming in the upper part of Michigan. Here Fredrick Smith found a job in one of the many iron mines and went to live in a company house. Edward went to school and dreamed dreams of becoming a ship captain. He read every book on the great ships that he could find. He scoured newspaper articles for stories. He knew what he wanted in his life and it was not to be a miner.
But by the time Edgar was twenty one he had been working in the mine for three years, was married to Sarah Elanor Pennington, and lived in company housing. But he still dreamed dreams of becoming a ship’s captain.
One night as he was coming home from work a beggar in a dirty green suit with funny shoes approached him and asked for $ .50 so he could eat. Poor Edgar didn’t have much money but felt sorry for the guy and gave him a couple of quarters. Just as he handed the beggar the quarters there was a bright light and the beggar revealed himself as an elf. Because of his kindness the elf was willing to grant him one wish.
Well Edgar had heard the fairy tales of elf wishes backfiring but he so badly wanted to be a Captain that he blurted out “ Make me a Captain of a great steamship “.
The elf said “as you have asked so shall it be.”
Suddenly Edward John Smith and family found themselves back in England. The year was 1887 and he was Captain of the Republic in the White Star line.
The elf had even provided them with a house worthy of a ship’s Captain.
Captain Smith rose rapidly in the quality of his commands until he was Captain on the maiden voyages of the biggest and best of the White Star ships. He took command of the Baltic, then the Adriatic, and finally the Olympic on their maiden voyages. He ate in the Captains dining room with the rich and the famous. From time to time he would remember his roots and invite a family from steerage to eat with him.
In April of 1912 he was asked to Captain the newest and greatest of the White Star ships on its maiden voyage. He stood on the deck and thought back over his life as a Captain. He remembered the elf and the wish. Then he thought he had always been told not to accept a wish from an elf because it would backfire. But here he is the most important ship Captain in the world. He would go down in history as having Captained every major ship of his time.
He thought that stuff about not taking a wish from an elf is just nonsense or” I’m not the Captain of the Titanic.”

####News from Pigeon Falls-The little town in my basement where the trains still run, dragons fly, and life is just a little strange. Leaving Jack’s Sauna General Bosley started up the street to his tent. He hoped to get there and change before anybody saw him in his “dress” uniform. But as luck would have it or Tommy UK there was Eino coming down the street.
“General” he said” You’ll be late for your meeting with Petrovich. Petrovich doesn’t like people to be late and you know how important this meeting is. I talked to Homeland Security this morning and they assured me this meeting could be the answer to our problems.”
With that he grabbed the General by the shoulder and escorted him to Petrovich’s home. There they were ushered into a big brightly lit room that seemed to be filled with people. Tommy UK , Charlie, two men from the Fly Inn, and some others the General didn’t know.
“ What is that retard doing here?” the general blurted out.
“I have asked you not to call Charlie a retard .” Exclaimed Tommy UK.
“ Anybody can see he is a retard by looking at him. Don’t give me any of that special person crap. He is what he is. And you kid better watch your mouth or I’ll loosen a few of your teeth” muttered the General.
“ Nice dress uniform General! “Tommy UK said with a smile. ”Charlie is here to open the box on the table. It is an exact replica of the one in the tree. We thought if we could prove to you that Charlie could open the box you would let him try. Because everybody in this room is sure that he is the pure of heart one”
“Your all nuts or all retarded if you think that his opening the box is going to change my mind.”
At that point Tommy UK instructed Charlie to open the box.
Charlie looked at his mother and she nodded .
Charlie opened the box. There was a flash of light, a noise like a loud explosion and the box disappeared.
From outside the house came the sound of people cheering.
At this point Petrovich asked to be alone with the General and everybody else left.

Today's Link-The Bayer Family Blog- Another MEME
It has been a good day. I cleaned up my blog. You will notice the little boxes on the right hand side replacing all the clutter that was there. I started on another elf tale. Then Betty and I went and picked five more items to sell on E-bay. They were photographed , boxed, weighed and then I listed them on E-Bay. One of the items made us very sad and I'll share that tomorrow. My son Patrick called and he and the boys are coming for the weekend. I need a breathing treatment.


Blogger Janvangogh said...

How did they get an exact replica of the box if no one could get to the original?

5:37 AM  
Anonymous quilly said...

Jan -- but somebody did -- and I think I know how. Gotta love that Tommy UK.

5:43 AM  
Blogger The Old Fart said...

Interesting tale Dr John, I knew where you were going as soon as the father's name was changed to Smith.

PS ~ I wonder if anyone from "The Titanic Historical Society" reads your blog?

A Blessed day is wished for you and Betty.

9:42 AM  
Blogger Josie said...

Dr. John, as soon as the fellow's name was changed to "Smith", I knew what was going to happen.

Of course! Of course!

What a wonderful story! And of course, he got his wish - and more! He's one of the few Captains of the important ships who will ever be remembered.

I have often wondered what his last thoughts were as the great ship slipped under the sea. Now I know!

11:58 AM  
Blogger W. J. St. Christopher said...

I dated an Elf, once. A very sweet boy -- but, oh so wily!

1:56 PM  
Blogger judie said...

Dr. John, I liked your elf story. I just don't know what to make of it. How did you know all that? Do you believe in elves?

2:25 PM  

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