Friday, February 17, 2006

No Dogs in Heaven Impossible

Saying for the day: If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons. James Thurber
------There is an argument going on in the ELCA as to how we get saved. Is it simply because we are human or does it take something else. If the saved by being human side ends up being right we have a new problem. It came immediately into my malfunctioning brain. Can dogs go to heaven. You know that dogs aren’t human. Not even smart ones like my son Peter’s or the one that my daughter’s friend has that rings a bell when it has to go to the bathroom. Nope dogs aren’t human. So can they go to heaven? Since I needed something to fill up blog space I offer you two old stories on dogs and heaven. (slightly changed to fit the doctrine)

A man comes to his Pastor and asks him to do a burial service for his dog.

Pastor will you do a little service for old Pard.

Gee! George I’d like to but dogs have no soul and only humans go automatically to heaven when they die.

But Pastor old Pard was a kind , loving, dog better than most humans that I know.

George , you know that the Lutheran Church teaches salvation by being human alone and not by good works. I can’t do a funeral service for a dog.

Okay Pastor, but I was going to give the church $500 in Pard’s memory.

George, George, why didn’t you tell me old Pard was Lutheran.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Story number 2:
An old man and his dog were walking down this dirt road with fences on both sides, they came to a gate in the fence and looked in, it was nice - grassy, woody areas, just what a 'huntin' dog and man would like, but, it had a sign saying 'no trespassing' so they walked on.
They came to a beautiful gate with a person in white robes standing there.

Welcome to Heaven Dogs aren't allowed, I'm sorry but he can't come with you.Didn't your Pastor tell you that only humans have souls.

What kind of Heaven won't allow dogs? If He can't come in, then I will stay out with him. He's been my faithful companion all his life, I can't desert him now.

"Suit yourself, but I have to warn you, the Devil's on this road and he'll try to sweet talk you into his area, he'll promise you anything, but, the dog can't go there either. If you won't leave the dog, you'll spend Eternity on this road .

So the old man and dog went on.

They came to a rundown fence with a gap in it, no gate, just a hole. Another old man was inside.

Scuse me Sir, my dog and I are getting mighty tired, mind if we come in and sit in the shade for awhile?

Of course, there's some cold water under that tree over there. Make yourselves comfortable .

You're sure my dog can come in? The man down the road said dogs weren't allowed anywhere.

Would you come in if you had to leave the dog?

No sir, that's why I didn't go to Heaven, he said the dog couldn't come in, only humans. We'll be spending Eternity on this road, and a glass of cold water and some shade would be mighty fine right about now. But, I won't come in if my buddy here can't come too, and that's final.

Welcome to Heaven.

You mean this is Heaven? Dogs ARE allowed? How come that fellow down the road said they weren't?

That was the Devil and he gets all the people who are willing to give up a life long companion for a comfortable place to stay. They soon find out their mistake, but, then it's too late. The dogs come here, the fickle people stay there. GOD wouldn't allow dogs to be banned from Heaven. After all, HE created them to be man's companions in life, why would he separate them in death?"

@@@
5700 spins without a win. After hapless loser finished losing yesterday he x ed out of Iwon.com. You know hit the little x in the corner. Then suddenly this sign comes up." Congratulations you are the one millionth visitor to this website. Wow, how great is that. Imagine a million people came to Iwon.com and he was the exact millionth one. No wonder he can't win at Iwon. There are a million people playing and spinning that darned wheel. Well if that wasn't special enough when he finished spinning today and x ing out the same sign came up. Two days in a row he was the millionth person. The odds must be earthshaking. Twice in two days being the millionth person. Tune in again tomorrow and see if he can time it just right to be the millionth person three days in a row. That would have to be some kind of world record. You can see it here on "As the World Spins", nominated for an early morning Clinker award.

****
Betty went back to painting her mountain. I was thinking of going to get a haircut (I look like an English sheep dog) but we can't get out of the driveway because of the snow. It will be plowed out by this afternoon but by then we are supposed to have a wind chill of -30 degrees.
The mail came and there was no new form from the ELCA ( as if I expected one) even though the guy, that they have no record of, promised me one in 5 to 7 days.
My bishop sent me an e-mail and told me he prays for me every Sunday and I appreciate that. I pray for him every day. But then bishops need more prayer than retired pastors.
What I would appreciate even more is the right form from the national church.
My computer hating sister called to tell me she couldn't get a hold of my other sister (the one that doesn't hate the President). My sister gets excited a lot when she can't get people on the phone. A number of times she has called my son because we were out shopping or gone to the movies. She called me back a half hour later to tell me that Chris had finally answered the phone, crisis over. ( A little crisis keeps the day from being totally dull)
Despite the cold we went grocery shopping. Its going to be colder tomorrow. I had forgotten how cold it could really get and didn't take my gloves. It seems even colder when you are holding onto the handles of a plastic walker and trying not to fall down.
Not much happened after we got home and now I need a breathing treatment.
GBYA

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your blog is going to the dogs.

9:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

James Thurber had it right...

What is wrong with a blog going to the dogs?

Bubbster: Even though we outlive our dogs, we have such wonderful memories of each one of them. It's worth it to get another one when the grieving is over.

6:39 PM  

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