Sunday, August 20, 2006

Grief step 3

Saying for the day- Above the dark clouds the sun still shines.

Today and every Sunday for the next seven Sunday’s we are looking at the steps in the grief process as described by Pastor Granger Westberg. These steps are:
1. Shock
2. Emotion
3. Depression
4. Physical pain
5. Fear or panic
6. Guilt
7. Anger
8. We function poorly
9. The breaking in of hope
10. The start of the new life
This week we look at depression.
This is the part of grieving that one person described as “ a dark black cloud falling over all of life”.

During this period we may feel lonely and lost.
The idea comes that God has left us or God doesn’t care.
This is a painful stage but a normal one.
It is normal to feel like this after a great loss.
You are not sick or different.

When we are depressed it feels like it will last forever.
But for most people the clouds pass and the depression slowly ends.
Some people move through this stage faster than others drawing on their own inner resources to move them to the next stage.
Others seem to linger and may need professional help to move on.

If you have a friend in this stage the best thing you can do for him or her is to keep visiting.
Assure them that this stage will pass.
This is a hard time to visit because you want to move them out of the depression and can’t.
But keep visiting. Keep assuring. Keep caring.
Little by little the clouds will blow away.

If your friend is a person of faith help them to call on the resources that faith gives them.
Pray with him or her.

Next week physical pain.

News from Pigeon Falls– the little town in my backyard.– The parade went well yesterday. Pastor Marvel mad quite a hit in his Captain Marvel suit. He really hammed it up. The 65 piece 3 man liar’s club band was a little out of tune but nobody cared. All the floats were well done and went without incident . If you don’t count the cross falling off of Last Lutheran’s float near the end of the parade route. Pigonelle Lodge number 1 had a giant pigeon on the back of a truck which was impressive. They had recorded coo’s played out of the back of the truck. All in all for a small town it was an impressive parade. For the kids the best part was picking up the candy thrown from the floats. You would think their parents never gave them any candy. A few fights even broke out among the kids.
The wildest thing happened after the parade. People were just millin around like you do when a parade is over when suddenly flying down the middle of main street was a small green dragon spewing fire. It was no Tom in a dragon suit. This was a dragon and everybody saw it. It turned at the edge of town and headed out into the woods. People were afraid it would set the woods on fire, but it didn’t. So the dragon is back. But there was no White Rabbit.
One tourist even too a video of the dragon. They played it over and over in the Fly Inn bar. It made for good drinking conversation. It was good that nobody got hurt. Nobody even got burned. But people are a bit scared. They keep looking up expecting something to come flying at them spewing fire. I bet obe could sell a lot of fireproof hats in Pigeon Falls right now.
Despite the dragon the Methodist ladies sold a lot of pasties and Nancy did a lot of business. It was a good day for the town. The bars didn’t suffer either.
Today's link- The Katzmeow- Remember to put Dr.John in the comment to get those furry little JCPOINTS. Check your total JCPOINTS HERE.
Betty is still sleeping we will have today's drawing when she gets up. If Margaret is drawn she gets what's in the JCPOINTS BOX and Bree will be happy at last.
While we are waiting let me tell you how depressed I am today. I lost the great liar's contest to my daughter-in-law by one vote. One crummy vote. I needed somebody to give me one more vote. I just needed one vote. Well really two votes to win but I would have been happy with being tied. How can I go to family gatherings with my head held high after this. This could be the end of the world . On the other hand it might not be. I'll let you know what I decide. In any case I am going into seclusion until I get over this horrible, horrible defeat. Don't waste your sympathy on me.I am old. The torch has passed to youth.
Betty is up and the name is drawn and it is ....

Gungirl Sorry Margaret (Sorry Bree) If she is drawn tomorrow she gets what's in the Prize Box. She has one chance in 62,953 of being drawn.Good luck Gungirl
Now because , I am so depressed, I think I will go sit in the sun without sun screen.
I do want to say it is all my fault. If I had just voted one more time last night before i went to bed. But I was over 200 votes behind. Some nice person pushed me up almost to winning. It is my fault, my grevious fault. I am so depressed I think I will watch TV.
The TV caused me to become even more depressed. So I quit and took up serious drinking. But after three cans of diet Sprite I am still depressed. I think I'll go play with my trains.
Betty really worked on the kitchen windows today including painting the sills. I played with the outside train. My depression lifted. Then built three fantasy cars. I might show you the train on Thursday.
Well I need a breathing treatment.


Blogger Janvangogh said...

That dragon needs to swoop down and carry someone away next time. That will add some excitement to the town.

4:49 AM  
Anonymous zingtrial said...

Hi, So my friend you lost the contest,next time He!He!He!
Wish you well

5:12 AM  
Blogger Chana said...

thank you for doing these sunday posts. i remember it was depression today and i was looking forward to it. after my car accident and while i still couldn't walk, all those months just laying there after being so active, i became very depressed. it was awful. it was so lonely. many horrible hours to think up horrible thoughts. i missed my kids back them terribly, they were brought to me not enough and it was hard to let go of me, who i had been and there was so much physical pain. it's still is hard sometimes, many times, do deal with the new me and all the entails but i'm trying to grow up and out of it. i had a wonderful team of homecare workers, physio and social worker who never left my side, once they knew of me. God Bless them, they and my kids are the reason i'm here. after many months and many bad times, they finally talked me into allowing myself to take Prozac. it saved my life. i helped me enough to find the fight in me to get up and try my best. it's hard to say that i need such medicine sometimes. who wants to declared that you are not perfect and need help. but i did and still do. and i'm grateful, for i have made a life for myself and my kids out of alot of stuff.
I think it's amazing that people got video of the dragon. Has anyone send it in to CNN or something? when the scientists find out about this, the town will overflow with people.
the parade sounds like fun. so what if there odd and ends that went aray. nothing is perfect. all parades have sounds like it was a great time..
i'm so sorry that you lost. i'm so sorry that you lost by one vote...i didn't go back and checked on the was me, i dropped the ball, i'm sorry. i hope you choose to not let this keep you from family gatherings and such. Lori loves you so much and she is so kind, she, i'm sure, won't flaunt the fact that she won..hugs, virtual ones as i know you don't like getting real ones except from Betty.

i'm starting to see it from Bree's point of view..i want someone to win the big prize too but the odds are just not with us..that shows me how incredible hard it is to win one of those million dollars lotteries..
hope you have a good sunday. enjoy. take care. don't be sad :) . read you tomorrow.

6:38 AM  
Blogger Margaret said...

Oh don't be depressed Dr. John. We've got something special cooking up for you. (snicker) =O)

7:04 AM  
Blogger Lori's Minute said...

It is a good thing you know that this stage of depression will pass....I feel awful now, unable to enjoy it knowing you are in such pain.

7:17 AM  
Blogger Doll House Stories said...

I am not feeling well so i just glanced at the story

8:40 AM  
Blogger QuillDancer said...

How nice of the dragon to join the parade. This will be making the cover of some tabloid soon, yes?

9:47 AM  
Blogger Katie said...

Thanks so much for visiting my blog and putting it as your link for the day! Even more fun is the fact that it is part of a contest!

It is lovely to see that that you find my blog worthy for the link of the day! Many thanks!

2:35 PM  
Blogger Sue said...

If only I have voted two more times!!! It's all my fault. If only I hadn't left town and been without a computer for a day. Is it better to have lied and lost then never to have lied at all.

Start getting ready for next time!

3:17 PM  
Anonymous Stacy said...

I'd love to see that dragon video!
Thanks for the mini lessons on grief. They're very interesting.

3:58 PM  
Blogger starbender said...

depression is sooooo sad!

5:20 PM  
Blogger Catch said...

thank you for posting about depression...many people suffer from it and I am sure it may help somebody.

5:33 PM  
Blogger Patrick said...

What sleeping at 4:00 pm in the evening? Good for her I wish I was.
lol. Flying dragons huh sure they all fun and games till someone is eaten or fried to a crisp. I would watch them.
Depression I think is the hardest of the grief steps to get past.


6:25 PM  

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