Friday, November 13, 2009

Friday Fourteen

Today's Saying

I have my own little world, but it's okay - they know me here. ~Author Unknown

Click HERE to get to my 55s

What you are about to read leans on the truth and bends it ever so little . But in the process every Friday you will catch a glimpse of me.And I save the cost of a psychiatrist.

1. Everyday I get two new entries in the Publisher’s Clearing House Contest but I won’t win ( stems from having no luck at all.)
2. The catalogues we are getting in our snail mail are beginning to out number those in E-mail ( Stems from being closer to Christmas)
3. There are piles of catalogues everywhere .( Stems from Betty’s fear that the perfect Christmas gift will be in the one we throw away)
4. Switched from Diet Coke to Diet Pepsi as my morning drink ( Stems from Diet Pepsi being on sale and we bought lots)
5. I now have five free magazines coming . ( Stems from inability to turn down something free. I don’t even like “ Wired”)
6. Every Sunday it takes three hours to upgrade the Church website . ( Stems from all the really stupid mistakes I make It should take an hour at most)
7. My long lost relatives in Kenya seem to have stopped dying and leaving me millions. ( Stems from their working on some new scam)
8. If I had won one real lottery for every ten scam lotteries I’ve “ Won” I would be so rich. ( Stems from scammers really liking me . What else could it be?)
9. Betty & I have one Christmas gift wrapped and mailed. ( Stems from its needing to be opened now so it can flower by Christmas)
10. Bought two Christmas Cactus plants from Publisher’s Clearing House that were supposed to be blooming by Christmas. There is no way they will. ( Stems from total gullibility)
11. I am doing most of my Christmas shopping for Betty on the internet and am almost done. ( Stems from inability to go anywhere without her driving.)
12. Am enjoying the new season of NCIS but still don’t care for NCIS Las Angeles. ( Stems from some spin offs just don’t have it)
13. Some places sure do charge a lot for the handling end of “plus postage and handling” ( Stems from old fashioned American greed)
14. Finally I am back to selling on E-bay. ( Stems from overcoming advanced procrastination.)

After much thought and discussion , after some screaming and head shaking, after being hit by the realization this is their one chance the group finally agreed on a story for Eugene to tell the old lady.
“It seems that in 2009 , back where the town used to be the daughter of an old Gypsy man fell in love with a man from Pigeon Falls. They dated and lived together for awhile and then he dumped her.
This angered her father who said that the honor of all Gypsies was tarnished by his action. He demanded that the man pay retribution and apologize to the tribe. He refused and some of his friends told the old Gypsy to bug off. They said it was all a scam to extract money from them.
At this the Old Gypsy announced that his personal honor was now at stake. He demanded an apology from the man’s tribe, the town, and a monetary retribution. The town council met and refused to comply with his wishes. In fact somebody on the council called him a scam artist to his face.
In anger he pronounced this curse:
Nothing seemed to happen.
But the next morning here was the entire town in 1890.
Now we really need help to lift the curse.
The people involved are repentant and willing to apologize to the Old Gypsy.
The town is willing to pay the price to restore his honor.
But to get back to 2009 we need help.
We need somebody to lift the curse.
Can you do it?”
Now all they have to do is sober up Eugene and plant the story in his head. Then guide him to the old lady/ Gypsy’s house.
While he sobers up they are going to keep telling each other the story close enough for him to hear.


Blogger Sandi McBride said...

I still enter the Publisher Clearing House via the the trash can (stems from laziness in responding to really important mail)
I can't figure out why Taylor Swift won so many awards when she has less talent than Taylor Hicks and (I've yet to hear her carry a tune). Who's that you say?
And I love catalogs, even though Mac keeps insisting they have nothing to do with cats or logs...
love your Friday posts, they make my day~

4:15 AM  
Blogger Diana said...

Diet Pepsi! Yuck ! I just won't drink soda if Diet Coke isn't on sale. Traitor!
Love Di

4:58 AM  
Blogger Melli said...

Wait! WAIT WAIT WAIT! Won't the Gypsy lady KNOW that she CAN'T lift the curse of another Gypsy? I dunno about this... only ONE chance... I'm biting my fingernails over this one!

I think today's saying sounds like a Dr. John ORIGINAL! :)

6:53 AM  
Blogger Nessa said...

I would drink water before I'd drink Diet Pepsi. i don't like the NCIS LA either.

Flash 55 - Blue Gill

8:25 AM  
Blogger Jim said...

I don't like Diet Pepsi at all. Diet Coke (or Coca Cola Lite) is my thing.
One way to make Diet Pepsi from the fountain palatable is to first squirt a half inch or so of regular Pepsi in the glass.

Give that drunk massive doses of nocturnal learning before he sobers and learn him the story real good. Did you ever try that?

8:56 AM  
Blogger Lou said...

How can you interchange Coke and Pepsi? They are completely different!

10:55 AM  
Blogger Jill said...

I stick to water, brewed green tea and coffee. Don't know what I'll do for the holidays. I barely get mail and PCH keeps sending me e-mail, but I never win, guess cause I don't live in Houston anymore.

10:55 AM  
Anonymous quilly said...

I have had to quit drinking diet anything that contains aspertame. I even had to dispose of my favorite breath freshener. I have developed an allergy and I get hives inside my mouth and down my throat. It really isn't comfortable.

Many years ago my father won a magazine sweepstakes -- the prize, a lady's diamond ring, was delivered to him the day after my step-mother's funeral. Sometimes it's just better to not win at all.

11:57 AM  
Blogger Bill ~ {The Old Fart} said...

So you have Long Lost Relatives in Kenya as well. I'll be glad when Christmas comes and goes, it has gotten way out of control with the Buy, Buy, Buy.

12:57 PM  
Blogger boots said...

Dr. John I am so excited I never when ANYTHING! I emailed you the info. Could you explain what a "wreck Oz" is like please?

You have a refreshing weekend..

6:22 PM  
Anonymous Alice Audrey said...

I can just see Eugene in jail, ear cocked to the bars while everybody stage-whispers the story.

8:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't like diet anything LOL. I like the fat stuff LOL. Geeze I gotta get going on Christmas...thanks for the reminder :) Have a great weekend :) Let's hope Eugene sobers up :)

9:05 AM  
Blogger Lindy said...

Plug her in, charge her up, get some rest in the meantime. Happy Saturday!

2:52 PM  

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