Tuesday, November 20, 2007

High, High, Cholersterol

Saying for the Day- Vegetables are interesting but lack a sense of purpose when unaccompanied by a good cut of meat. ~Fran Lebowitz

A month or so ago Betty went and had her cholesterol checked.
Let me tell you something about Betty. She is a very careful eater. She avoids fatty foods, doesn’t eat many eggs, eats lots of salads, always reads labels, never uses real butter, and eats health smart cereals. We expected her cholesterol would be low. But it wasn’t . It was very high. So high the Doctor called the day after the test and got her started on some pills.

This also got her started worrying about me. I’m a meat and potatoes man. I love lots of butter on my potatoes ( real butter) and I like my french fries dripping with fat. I eat an egg almost every morning. I use real butter on my toast. I drink a lot of cocoa . I love rich fatty deserts. In other words I am a terrible eater. So when I went to the Doctor she suggested that I should get my cholesterol tested. The Doctor, of course, agreed. I wasn’t so wild about the idea since it requires twelve whole hours without eating but I went along. What Betty wants Betty gets.
So yesterday the results of the test came back. The Doctor’s office sent me a letter. It gave the results of the test and next to the cholesterol numbers was written “ these are great”. I have low cholesterol numbers. I, who eat wrong, have low cholesterol . Wow!
Now Betty should be happy for me but I think she feels that life has cheated. I should have high numbers and she should have low. She ate by the rules and I didn’t.
So why are my numbers so low? Thank you mom and dad. It’s all in the genes. Before the test my sister told me not to worry she always tests low and so will I. It’s our inheritance. She seems to be right.
Again thank you mom and dad and I’ll have a little more butter on those potatoes.

#### News from Pigeon Falls-The little town in my basement where the trains still run, dragons fly, and life is back to normal. The birthday party for Mabel went very well last night. Last Lutheran was full of relatives and friends. Petrovich was outstanding as master of ceremonies. He had people laughing till they almost fell off their chairs. The highlight of the evening was when grandma Mabel danced with a great grandson. That old lady still has a lot of bounce. She announced at the end that she expects them all back when she reaches one hundred and ten.
The party was all people were talking about at Nancy’s today. All the expected things. Like how good it was to see her children again and how well they looked. There were lots of comments on how cute the great, great grandchild was. There were even a few comments about how surprised people were to discover Petrovich had a sense of humor. They thought of him more as a dark ,scary, person. Like the guy that carries the sign that says “The end is coming!”.
Mabel is getting ready to fly down to her daughter’s in Florida for Thanksgiving. Her son is going with her. They are taking the train to Iron Mountain tomorrow. From there they will fly to Chicago and from there to Miami. Her daughter will pick them up with the van at the airport.
Mabel really wanted the family to stay and have Thanksgiving at the old family home. She promised to cook up a feast. But they persuaded her to go to Florida instead. They wanted to make it easier for her. But with airport security being what it is, and the long lines in the airport, this may be harder on her than cooking for them all would be. The price of safety is inconvenience.
Today's link- A Cat in the Kitchen- Seemed like a good day for a food blog . One with Helsinki in it.
I spent the entire day in the basement. Slowly the new layout is shaping up. The last table is in place .Betty came down in the afternoon and started unpacking the houses for the village. Now I need a breathing treatment.


Blogger Janvangogh said...

Come the next driblet, no doubt some will now be waiting for the punch line.

7:03 AM  
Blogger Stacy said...

So far I have the same luck as you...I eat all the wrong things and my cholesterol is fine.

8:06 AM  
Anonymous quilly said...

My cholesterol always tests good, too. So, let's have big bowls of real ice cream topped with whip cream and chocolate fudge -- except I have to watch the calories, and they make it very easy for me to watch them by packing themselves on my ... but just the same, enjoy!

9:07 AM  
Blogger Jill said...

I tend to agree with George Carlin in regards to food. It is going to kill us one way or the other, so I am going to enjoy my food. I would rather enjoy myself for a few years than be healthy and have noone around me any more.

9:18 AM  
Blogger judie said...

Tell Betty she is not alone. I have to take those dadburn pills too. I tried to do it the natural way taking red yeast rice but it didn't work. But......kudos to Betty for reading labels and eating healthy. If we don't have our health, we have nothing. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving....well, I know you will since you can eat ALL that stuff!

5:03 PM  
Blogger Margaret said...

It's in the genes, thank goodness. If the results were worse you would have really been on a diet.

No fair though, I'm with Betty on this one - she's been a good girl so why can't she enjoy tasty stuffs. =O(

5:19 PM  
Blogger Louisiana said...

oh does my mom know about this. my mom, she is a true vegan woman. there is no milk, eggs, etc...she eats more like a rabbit than a rabbit does. she doesn't drink juices for their sugar content. she is not so into desserts. she is not allowed to have coffee at all...that woman can make a meal appear out of nowhere i have seen it and still don't understand it. besides fruits and veggies (and she won't touch anything with onions or garlic) and most sugars, My mom the one that cholesterol is through the roof. wasn't it her shock back a few yrs when told. she was asked to bring the numbers down immediately and she tried, and tried and they never bulged so now she is with mandatory medicine!

my mom who treats and etas as if her body was a temple. who believes it belongs to God and she must take it seriously and do her best, is still on meds and still with such high numbers..

and Aileen and I, her daughters who are meat and potatoes and fried food girls have amazing numbers..

so let's enjoy the ride Dr. John and no smirking (wink) in front of Betty too much. remember she is in control of your oxygen as you always joke and besides she is the cook, lol...

love and hugs...

Francesca went to sleep on tuesday night with one of her creams on. let's hope wed brings the other cream samples from the Rep at the Dermatologists office...a new post coming up...

God is Great.

12:36 AM  
Blogger Bazza & Wifey said...

Just like Betty my cholesterol is high and I am on tablets. At least now I know who to blame, just wait 'til I see my mother!

1:27 AM  
Blogger QUASAR9 said...

Comming up to the great day
and he's already hi-high on cholesterol

5:17 AM  
Blogger Catch said...

you are so lucky Dr John. I am also on the pills since I had the heart surgery. I do eat real butter though.I just dont eat a lot of it...oleo is like eating plastic.... If you leave oleo out on the picnic table in the summer the flies wont even eat it!!!! So how good can it be for us>?

10:07 PM  
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12:53 AM  

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