Sunday, September 03, 2006

Grief step five- Fear and Panic

Saying for the Day: Life will never be the same again.

Today and every Sunday for the next five Sunday’s we are looking at the steps in the grief process as described by Pastor Granger Westberg. These steps are:
1. Shock
2. Emotion
3. Depression
4. Physical pain
5. Fear or panic
6. Guilt
7. Anger
8. We function poorly
9. The breaking in of hope
10. The start of the new life
For most people there comes a point in the grief process where fear or panic sets in.
We are afraid we will never know love again.
We are afraid we will never get another job.
We are afraid that we will never be happy again.
What we fear depends on what caused the grief in the first place.

At this point people try to think of something else but keep coming back to the fear until they are the edge of panic.
Sometimes people feel that they are losing their mind.
This is a time when we really need other people and we need to do things even though we don‘t feel like it.
If we know that what we are experiencing is a normal part of the grief process that knowledge actually helps us to have less fear.

We need to remind ourselves that the process will end.

Life will be good again, different, but good.

News from Pigeon Falls-the little town in my backyard where the trains still run and old ladies carry shotguns– The White Rabbit still hasn’t made an appearance. Mrs. Trumble says she is ready if he does. She and Demon Slayer ( the name she has given her shotgun) will send it home again. The dragon hasn’t been seen either and one wonders if it’s afraid of Mrs. Trumble.
Tomorrow , they are having a bridge walk over at Crippled Creek. It’s a small town version of the walk over the Mackinaw Bridge. It is of course a lot smaller. But there will be a parade out to the bridge and there will be a big party afterward. Beer and hot dogs will be be sold as well as pop for the kids. There will be a street dance in the evening. The Three Violins and an Oboe will play ( the band doesn’t have a single violin or an oboe. Where do they get these names?) .People are sort of expecting both Mrs. Trumble and the dragon to show up. Eino hopes that won’t happen as she might blow out one of the store windows trying to hit a flying target.
Not to many people in church at Last Lutheran this weekend it was the last weekend before school and people took advantage of it. Pastor Marvel preached on keeping the ten commandments (not your usual Lutheran sermon). At the 10:00 service he broke a big stone tablet which had the commandments on it. He said that’s what Moses did when he returned and found that people had turned away from God. It was a great sermon. Its too bad there were so few people to hear it.
The Methodist ladies will be selling pasties tomorrow afternoon before the street dance. Somebody asked if dragons like pasties but nobody seemed to know. It seems that pasties would give the dragon plenty of gas to keep his fire going.

Today's link:The Brown Cottage-the life chronicles of another soul on earth- Remember to put Dr.John in the comments to get those college approved JCPOINTS. Check your points HERE.
Yesterday we drew Lor's Minute and if we draw her again today she gets what's in the Prize Box.
She has one chance in 503 of being drawn.
We will draw when Betty gets up.

Well Betty got up late and we got busy but finally the slips got cut in and Betty drew. The name drawn today is

. Sorry Lori ( sorry Bree) Good luck Nea. If Nea is drawn tomorrow then she gets what's in the prize box.
Spent most of the day doing the September web page for the church ( I'm only three days late). I changed the layout a bit. Then I took pictures of the prizes for the drawing tomorrow. Betty and I also spent some time at a web site called Pogo playing games.
Well I need a breathing treatment.


Blogger Mimi said...


I am still wanting more on the hermit!

4:14 AM  
Blogger Janvangogh said...

The Dorothy Heralds got their name out of a phone book. Maybe the band got their name off of a music store inventory list?

4:25 AM  
Blogger Cindy said...

I've been witnessing the grief process as Beth deals with her husband being incarcerated- it is as you say and at this time she easily wavers back and forth between fear and panic along with the previous steps. She is having more and more days where she sees glimmers of hope and recognizes that life will once again be good eventually.

6:04 AM  
Blogger Chana said...

fear or panic is a scary step. it has the potential of gripping your heart and mind and not ever really letting go. even when i moved on, i still know that they are not really far behind. still working on this for sure...
glad you are doing this. thank you.
lock up Mrs. EasyHandShotgun until the celebrations are over. it sounds like a promising good time and we wouldn't want her killing anyone or the party.
the sermon sounds pretty good. i betcha it caught everyone's attention.
i hope Lori wins the prize box. the odds are high but it would surely cheer up all their hearts. and then, besides you still get to see the train set etc.
i hope you are both having a good wknd. glad you had such a nice piece of steak in your celebritory dinner. take care and read you tomorrow. hi to Betty pls.

6:33 AM  
Blogger Margaret said...

Sitting here this morning thinking back on the times I had grieved, I am so thankful that my Mother raised me to know the Lord. That doesn't mean I didn't go through the grieving process. Just that some like "Fear and Panic" have been merely fleeting thoughts.

Oh, maybe that is because I'm old and been through the wringer so much I know by now that situations always seem to change for the better.

7:02 AM  
Blogger QuillDancer said...

Most of my memories of the first couple of days after my Gram died (she raised me) are just snap shots. Flashes of pictures without much context. However, I remember the fear.

I was only 18. Old enough to be an adult, but not really an adult.
All my brothers and sisters were married and had families of their own. I felt so alone.

7:53 AM  
Blogger QuillDancer said...

Btw -- today is Bazza's birthday! Everybody remember to go say hello!

7:55 AM  
Blogger Sue said...

Witz's Marina in Skanee has a bridge walk too. Hundreds of people turn out for the event. Can't imagine why, the bridge is only 30 feet at best. It couldn't have anything to do with the food and refreshements?

I hope everyone is having a great weekend.

8:52 AM  
Blogger Nea said...

I have worked my way from #1 to #8 rather quickly.....sigh.

Wow I was is so amazing to see your name in big bold blue letters and know that once in your life you just might actually win something. It isn't the prize that is is the issue, it is actually winning. Bree, I hope you are rooting for me. Or is it routing? Well anyway, nice, nice.

I am rather worried about that rabbit......

12:47 PM  
Blogger Catch said...

I am enjoying your posts on the grieving process.....I am sure it is very hard to do things we need to do while suffering such feelings of loss..and Im sure for some it does feel that life will never be the same again. When I would get so upset about the way my life was going while living with my X, I would just sit and talk to God out loud...I would talk to him and ask him to help me get through it...and he did. He gave me courage to get through it....and not be afraid to go out on my own. I always felt better after one of my talks with him. And yes I had panic and fear...sometimes I couldnt leave my house...but I made it through it..and I am greatful for all the things I can do today such as fly in an airplane, go to the beach,go shopping with friends, because there was a time I could do none of that.The thought of leaving my house sent me into such fear.I so appreciate the things I can do today..I dont take my freedom for granted. And I know God was with me every step of the way.

12:59 PM  
Anonymous Crazy Object B. said...

Hello From dr.johns blog to you he he funny!


2:08 PM  
Anonymous Stacy said...

I've noticed that the best sermons are often the ones heard by the fewest people. Hmmm....

7:38 PM  
Blogger Patrick said...

Pogo I think you get into canasta games there. I used to play on pogo myself. Oh Happy Anversery I am glad you got to go out and get your streak.


12:34 AM  
Blogger Patrick said...

Oh ya I forgot is it a bad thing to get stuck in the fear and panic place when does it become a issue?


12:36 AM  

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