Wednesday, March 29, 2006

We won.

Saying for the day: Beware the hidden cost of winning!

My wife , who usually answers the phone was taking a bath ( she takes too many baths) the other morning when the phone rang. This meant that I had to wheel to the phone, which is in the kitchen, ( if we had money we’d get another phone) or just listen to it ring.

This got me slightly irritated.

But this was a good call.

I answer: Hello, what do you want now. ( I thought it was one of the kids)

A voice filled with joy and happiness says. I want to congratulate you on winning..

I cut happy voice off and the conversation went as follows.

Its about time you called. This is Publisher’s Clearing House isn’t it?

No.

Sure. They would have the rung the doorbell and given me a big check. Right?

I guess so.

So you must be either Group Lotto or Prize America. Did I get the million or just some stupid car.

No we are not..


Well then you must be Iwon.com . Did I get the $10,000 daily prize or the $25,000,000. Don’t tell me I got one of those stupid little monthly prizes.

No

Good then I got the $10,000 right.

No this isn’t Iwon.com.

I suppose your one of those contests I didn’t even know I entered because the company that enters me in 100 contests every day did it for me.

No.

Well who in the darn( I didn’t say darn but this is family blog) world are you?

Well sir. We are the “Life is Better in Orlando Agency”. We choose your name at random from a phone number list.

Wonderful when do you send me the check for a million. Or do I just get one of those stupid T-shirts?

No. Actually you have won a trip.

A trip. Wow. Hey Betty! I know your in the bath but we’ve won a trip. A real trip. Can you believe it a trip.

That’s right sir. Five days and four nights in one of Orlando’s finest motels. With a two day cruise thrown in.

Wow! Hey Betty we got a cruise too. This is free isn’t it.

Well, sort of.

What do you mean sort of. If its not really free I don‘t want to hear about it..

You’ll miss all those wonderful days and nights.

I don’t care if Its not free you can forget about my signing on.

Its your loss.

I know but that’s house rule number 15.

House rule number 15.

Yes it reads as follows: Phone answering people in this house are forbidden to accept free trips unless there is no cost involved.


But its just a little registration fee.

I ‘m really sorry but rule 15 is very clear.

At this point the phone begins to hum. I think he must have just gone to check on something.

If he doesn’t call back we’ll never get to Orlando.

But I won today’s telephone game.

@@@
7650 spins without a prize. Old Hapless saw his kind of loser on "Wheel of Fortune". Twice she had large sums of money and seemed to know what the words were. She went for that last spin that would give her just a little more and hit bankrupt. So she had nothing. She even had to give back a $1000 prize she picked up. Now that's bad luck. She is certainly welcome at his big losers party.
Well Uncle Wiggly lovers if Old Hapless doesn't get the wires on his new train crossed causing the fuse to blow thus leaving no power for the computer. we will be back tomorrow with "As the World Spins".
***

Walked twice from the lift chair to the bathroom with the walker. It was more like walking and less like hoping. The left knee still hurts a lot. Betty went to Tops. She came home not very happy because she had a gain. Now she is making something for tonight's service. Stayed off of oxygen all day. I measured the blood oxygen every hour and it was fine. The lungs seem to be coming back after the fall. Betty has gone to church so I'll have to wait for my breathing treatment.
GBYA

39 Comments:

Blogger Laurie said...

Haha... I should try messing with the heads of telemarketers just for fun. Usually I just tell them (if they somehow manage to get past my privacy manager) "Don't call here again - EVER", and hang up.

Don't you have a cordless phone?

5:53 AM  
Blogger kristi said...

There is always something more involved when they tell you of the "free" trip!! For once getting something truly for free would be really nice!!

6:37 AM  
Blogger Dr. Cissa Fireheart said...

lmao Dr. John!

I usually just say -- Sorry Not interested and hang up...

I really need to learn how to torture these people more...hehe

7:01 AM  
Blogger Mimi said...

I would love to witness it when you get the next call. I wish I had that talent.

7:10 AM  
Blogger Chana said...

I bet you his 'how to handle booklet for all situations' didn't have an entry for you...lol...i'm glad you got some fun out of it...hope you are well...read you tomorrow.

7:18 AM  
Blogger Lori's Minute said...

I do not like answering the phone either. I am with Betty, take lots of baths!

8:44 AM  
Blogger Mimi said...

You seem to have fun with those calls. But if you want them to stop call, 1-888-382-1222 and register your ph# for no solicitation. Since I have done it I get no telemarketers calling. In fact if it were not for my hubbys dumb students, our phone would never ring at all.

9:09 AM  
Blogger Bella said...

That was great! I like your wit and I laughed hysterically at that clever conversation.

So, what do you do when people call to sell you something? Sell them stuff back? I do. ;)

9:19 AM  
Blogger Allypooh said...

Heh...Dr. John, that was AWESOME...you are the coolest old guy I've ever read.

10:13 AM  
Anonymous TC said...

Tee hee!

Bet that's bent his boat out of shape!

Keep up the good work, Doc. We've only got 3 million of 'em left to go!

Time will fly when you're having fun.

11:38 AM  
Blogger Belle said...

I like the ones where they call you and say you get a free vacation IF you take a tour of the facility and sit through a 3-hour video. Yeah, right!

1:07 PM  
Blogger The Center of the Universe said...

Sir John, That was OUT-STANDING! I usually answer telemarketers with one accent or another, or just switch to my fluent German, which really messes with them. My brother likes to get their home number to call them back at HIS convienience, usually at 2:30am! They don't take him up on it.

2:10 PM  
Blogger Pennie said...

Hello Dad,

I like that method. Today I got a call at work. I just kept saying " I am sorry but I can't make any decisions or authorizations." The phone worker went on again I stated "I can't even have mail sent to me without authorization." They asked for the authoriztion person and I gave them the front desk number."

I hate to beg but how about stopping by my blog and commenting.

Pennie

4:10 PM  
Anonymous MsShad said...

Having to wait for a breathing treatment just doesn't sound ... good.

And I'm shocked at you. After all your begging for comments, you haven't gone to Penny's and commented?

Or mine?

Sheesh

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