Wednesday, September 19, 2007

A Pooper Scooper

Saying for the Day: Watch where you step. A dog may have been there first.

Yesterday my wife took Maggie , the family dog, for a walk. She took with her a pooper scooper and a plastic bag.
When I was a kid we had no pooper scoopers. It stayed where it fell unless it fell on what little sidewalk we had then you kicked it aside or got ma’s old broom ( never the new one) and swept it aside . You shook your head and went ick all the while. People who walked in the grass took their chances. Most people just avoided the stuff. Sometimes my dad would step in it and then I would hear some of those words that I couldn’t say less I had my mouth washed out with soap. They were all directed at the dog as if the dog set out to get my dad. But for the most part it lay there until it cut up by the lawn mower and returned to the soil. It was a was a simpler life.
They had pooper scoopers in my age in the city. They were advertised in the Chicago paper. We used to laugh about them.
But not where I lived. In my neighborhood dogs ran free. My dog used to walk me to the school bus stop. Then go home. But when the bus brought me back in the evening he was there waiting for me. It was a different , wonderful, age.
But this is the age of the pooper scooper. IF your rich you can buy them really fancy with diamonds in the handle. You put the poop in a designer bag with disposable plastic inserts. That way it doesn’t look like your carrying poop.

@@@@ News from Pigeon Falls-The little town in my basement where the trains still run, dragons fly, and it has gotten still colder. – The temperature has dropped to ten above zero in Pigeon Falls. Ice is clearly forming on the Lake of the Loons.Two National networks ABC and CBS mentioned Pigeon Falls and had aerial shots on the afternoon news. Katie Couric ( a woman of power) said that Pigeon Falls was becoming like Narnia where it is always winter and never Christmas.
Petrovich was upset because the broadcasts didn’t mention the driblets he was working with. They ignored him altogether.
The good news for Pigeon Falls is that Washington is now aware of the problem and a team of scientists has been dispatched to try to find out what is happening. They will arrive by train today. There is some fear that an enemy has found a way to manipulate the weather. The whole thing could be a terrorist plot.
Somebody who read Petrovich’s website suggested that all the ladies in town should sing. The problem there is that it has to be a lady of power which leaves out most of the town and nobody knows what should be sung. In addition part of the town still thinks Petrovich is crazy.
Petrovich says he has translated a part of what he hadn’t been able to translate before and will post it to driblet seventy seven sometime today.
In the meantime life goes on in Pigeon Falls. Margaret Worthwhile got her electric bill today and went through the roof. It was twice what she paid last month and far higher than her neighbors. She says that if she doesn’t get an explanation she is going to contact the state facility commission . Mrs. Peabody says that they have this new billing machine and sometimes it sends the wrong bill to the wrong house. She will check to see if this happened in Margaret’s case.You would think that since both ladies belong to the same circle at the Methodist church they could just work it out.

Today's Link-Zingers- You must go to the link inside the link. Seldom has parody been done that well.
I had an interesting day. I saw one soap. Then Betty and I went to the hearing aid office. We got lost, of course. We got there just before our appointment. I ended up ordering a hearing aid. Then we went out to eat. Then to Wal Mart. Now I need a breathing treatment.


Blogger Janvangogh said...

Okay. So it should be all the married ladies of Pigeon Falls. No doubt most of the married men in Pigeon Falls would say their wives have power over them.

Then again, they would probably say that about their daughters too.

So I say, the women of Pigeon Falls should just go ahead and sing.

6:34 AM  
Blogger geosmythe said...

Life was better when the poop was left alone- and had not become a status symbol.

8:10 AM  
Blogger Stacy said...

Poop happens.....and usually on a walk in someone else's yard. Hence, my need to scoop poop. Keeps the neighbors happier.

9:07 AM  
Blogger judie said...

Pooper scoopers are a GOOD thing! It keeps the neighbor's dog poop off of MY yard! In Florida, you don't want to be standing near a pile of dog poop in the hot, steaming, summer sun! Well, you don't actually need to be standing NEAR if it's cooking in the sun, you'll know it's there! The best thing to do, like me, is let your dog poop in his own yard where it is easily disposed of, THEN take him for his walk!

9:09 AM  
Blogger Jill said...

Poop is nature's way of letting us know poop happens to us all. Even the rich have to deal with it, or get their maid/assisttant/nanny/ butler/handler do it. I wonder if Paris Hilton has a bejeweled scooper? Then again, does she even pick up poop? Half the time she can't even find her dog much less the poop.

9:33 AM  
Blogger Margaret said...

I have to laugh, you must have never lived down South nor met the dreadful fire ants.

They thrive off of Dog poo and will build up a huge nest underneath it overnight. Then it's not a matter of stepping on anything "yuk" but instead something "ouch".

They'll swarm your entire foot and leg. Socks, shoes, long pants won't matter. They get in and bite you over and over and over. You have to take off your clothes right then and there then run into your house for cover.

You'll be covered with itchy blisters that burn for days. It's terrible. Thou must poop scoop here below the mason dixon line.

6:59 PM  
Anonymous quilly said...

I had a yellow lab named George who always went to the bathroom in the same spot in our yard. Never any worry where we played. Just avoid George's corner. [And no, he wasn't trained to do that.]

He was also remarkably easy to house train. One incident. One gentle reprimand. Never another accident.

8:47 PM  
Blogger Nessa / Goldennib said...

Everything must be regulated today.

3:12 AM  
Blogger bazza27 said...

Pooper scoopers are just another way of reminding you that progress isn't always a good thing.

4:28 AM  
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