Thursday, February 21, 2008

A Political Problem

Saying for the Day-Thinking about profound social change, conservatives always expect disaster, while revolutionaries confidentially expect utopia. Both are wrong.Carolyn Heilbrun:
An Elf Tale
Once upon a time, a really short time ago, there lived two men.
One lived in the big and exciting city of Chicago and the other in a little Wisconsin town called Florence.
Chicago , of course, is known as a great Gateway city.
While Florence is known as Florence.
Chicago has the Bears and the Bulls.
Florence once had a winning basketball team.
In any case this story is not about the city or the town but about the two men who lived there. Robert lived in Chicago and Ralph lived in Florence and the one thing they has in common was Presidential Candidate Hillary Clinton.
Robert thought she was perfect. She would make the greatest President ever. She would feed the poor, get us out of the stupid Iraq War, get health care for everybody, and make us once again the world’s greatest nation. He went to every Hillary rally held in Chicago and there were lots of them.
Ralph, on the other hand, thought that Hillary as President would be a disaster. She would ruin the health care system, destroy the economy, and open the nation to wide spread terrorist attacks. He spent his time forwarding anti-Hillary E-mail and there was lots of it.
The two men never met, one being in Chicago and one in Florence, which was probably a good thing.
They would never have gotten along.
This even though Robert’s third cousin on his Mother’s side was also a third cousin of Ralph’s third cousin on his Father’s side.
Fate , elves, and Hillary would cause their lives to intersect for one brief moment that would change the world.
One day as Ralph came out of Barb’s Restaurant he ran into one of those “passing through people” who needed something to eat. Ralph, feeling sorry for him, gave him $ 5.00 and told him to have the special in Barbs. As the man entered the restaurant Ralph turned to find a short man in a green suit with curly shoes standing next to him.
“Because of your kindness” the elf said.”I am granting you one wish.”
On the same day at about the same time in Chicago Robert helped a poor old woman cross the street and carried her groceries to her apartment. As he left the building he met a short man in a green suit with curly shoes.
“Because of your kindness” the elf said.”I am granting you one wish.”
Ralph did not hesitate but wished that Hillary never become President.
Robert did not hesitate but wished that Hillary become President at this election.
Both men got the usual “As you have asked so shall it be “ response.
Both men wished at exactly the same time, right down to the second.
This had never happened before in the history of the Elf Kingdom.
Two people had wished for opposing things before but always at different times and in such cases the last wish always countered the first.
But now the two wishes met head to head.
They came together at Elf Wish Central.
This is sort of an elf factory for wishes.
Because they both were wished at exactly the same time and because both wishes could not be granted the elf factory ground to a halt. Magic began to back up as additional wishes arrived.
All of the elves were called home.
No further wishes could be awarded until the problem was solved.
Since wish bestowing was the primary employment in Elf Land this caused large scale unemployment, a distinct problem for any land.
But the call to quit awarding wishes had come too late.
The pressure of the elf magic pushed out into the Elf Kingdom causing the ground to ripple and breaking dishes that had taken years to accumulate. Now with no dish makers and no magic the poor elves had to eat off of bare tables.
But the magic pushed down into the earth beyond the Elf Kingdom causing earthquakes. Then the magic pushed up into the air causing hurricanes and Global Warming. Day by day it got worse.
The greatest Elf minds were called together . Elf theologians and Elf philosophers were consulted but no solution was seen. All agreed that one could not take back wishes once they were spoken. But one old elf said that when the election comes Hillary will either be elected President or not. Real events will allow one wish to win and then the wishes will be mute and fall away.
So we wait the National election. Until then it is Hillary’s fault that all these bad things are happening. Her fault because she inspired such loyalty from her follower and such dislike from her distracter that they forgot that elf wishes never work the way you expect. Ralph should have known better.

####News from Pigeon Falls-The little town in my basement where the trains still run, dragons fly, and life is back to normal. Petrovich still hasn’t posted driblet 132 despite his promise to do so. He says it has something to do with snowmobiles and the dragon . His problem seems to be trying to translate two driblets at the same time, one on an old lady having a baby and one about snowmobiles.
If it wasn’t bad enough that Pigeon Falls has the worst roads in the country the price of gas at the Perriwinkle station is now $3.50 a gallon. That price is for Regular not Super Premium. People who have to use their cars are moaning and groaning. If some politician offered to tax the oil company executives at 75% they would get lots of votes in Pigeon Falls. On the other hand Dr. Fortress is happy since more people are using his trains instead of cars to go to Iron Mountain and Marquette.
Last Lutheran had good attendance at their Wednesday night service . Pastor Joan is doing a Lenten series on the woman around Jesus. Each week she takes on the character of one of those woman and talks about what it was like to meet Jesus. Last night she played the woman at the well. She really made the character come alive. When she got to the part where the woman sort of knew that Jesus was the Messiah she ran down the aisle shouting “ Come and see the One who told me everything I ever did”. Then she stopped ran back to the front of the congregation, turned, and invited them to “Come and see Jesus”.

Today's Link-Come on Fall With Me- Celebrating one of Life's Special toothy events.
It was a nice day. Breathing was good. Didn't need the little tanks. I visited all my links and that was interesting. I did some work on Betty's computer. Took off Norton's and put on a free virus catcher. I changed her desktop to pictures of Crustal in Winter. I loaded a new game on for her. She went to Bible study. Now I need a breathing treatment.


Blogger Janvangogh said...

I like Pastor Joan.

If Hillary becomes President, I hope she can finally get the troops out of Germany.

5:12 AM  
Anonymous loisontheweb said...

HILLARY ... one either loves her or hates her. I do not love her. Not to elves ... I am praying that one of the Republican candidates is chosen.
I think I may opt to move to Pigon Falls?

5:37 AM  
Blogger Cindy said...

Hopefully we won't have to worry about Hillary as President.

6:27 AM  
Anonymous quilly said...

I'd like to attend those Lenten services! Would the church provide a shuttle?

8:42 AM  
Blogger The Old Fart said...

So it is the Elves that grant us our wishes, and because of Ralph and Robert all wishes have been stopped.

Is this just in the US at the moment or all over the world that Elf wishes have been stopped.

A Blessed Day is wished for you and Betty.

9:48 AM  
Blogger butterflies said...

Im so confused about politics here!!
Everyone says the same things but it all means nothing.

12:57 PM  
Anonymous AtomiK Kitten said...

Thanks for the prayers, Dr. John. I am so scared right now. I mean, the worst that can happen is that they take out my ovary, and I knew one day it would come to this, but still.

Your prayers mean a lot to me. I am sorry I haven't stopped by as much as I used to. With spring recruiting and this ovary thing and tort law last semester, it's been very rough.

4:03 PM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home